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(120 votes) Published: Feb 20, 2006 6:17 a.m. In 12 Favorites Lists Viewed 734 times
Here is a different type of egg. If you are like me then you like ot answer the phone in different ways. just saying Hello is boring so thats why i wrote/collected this list. I wouldent read it all it is pretty long you can if you want. (my fav is the one where your say (name of town)sperm bank, you spank it ,we bank it.) So here it is
(Name of your town) sperm bank, you spank it, we bank it! How may I help you?
You are the weakest link. Goodbye
"I’ve got the money, just let her go, she’s been through enough."
Acme Funeral parlor. You stab ’em. We slab ’em.
House of God, Moses speaking, how may I help you?
Suicide Hotline
If the person says hello fisrt scream ’Who sent You?!’
Make the "beeep beeep beeep" busy tone noises and hang up
I told you not to call when my wife’s home...
Joe’s Crematorium - You kill ’em, we grill ’em.
"Your gonna be my new phone buddy"
"Hello? OH NO! the voices are back again!"
"Hello? this is the office of Osama Bin Laden... how can i help you?"
hello, this is the suicide hotline.. please hold
say very panicky "send someone in with the money and no one gets hurt!"
what’s your favorite scary movie?
Thanks for calling Plan Parenthood...Press one for your girlfriends results
The number you have called is not in service.. Please try again
[last name]’scold storage you stab ’em we slab ’em
"Hello Johnny? i told you to dump the body! now hurry up before we get caught!"
"Hello, i’m a secret agent... oops, i have to kill you now"
(name of town) sperm bank, you whack it we pack it
Hello This is the office for insane induviduals
Reding Taxidermy"You snuff we stuff em!"
this is heaven this is hello
You will die in seven days... until then would you like to buy cable TV?
Federal Bureau of Investigation tips line, this call has been traced
Pizza Hut Tokyo, how may we help you
santa?i wanna(watever u want)
Sorry I’m dead right now. Talk to you later
Tex’s Taxidermy, You Snuff ’Em, We Stuff ’Em
Thank you for calling AT&T. Please listen to the following options and...
Ways to answer your phone
You have reached 555-1234. This number has been changed to 555-1234.
[name]ice cream shop home of the 30scoop sunday where you splurg then purge
Bob There?
Burger King, home of the Whopper, what’s your beef?
constipation inialation...are you running low on exlax?
Helo (adleb) house of whores we have a 2 for 1 special please place your order
no ones home
Can you hold on a sec? [Leave on indefinite hold]
Joes pool shack, liquor in the front, poker in the rear
Do you have the item?
hair control if you have hair we’ve got nair
Petes’s Palace of Pleasure Pete Speaking
Sorry, she’s dead. Can I have her call you back?
"County Morgue. You stab ’em, we bag ’em."
(name of town) abortion clinic, you rape it, well scrape it.
hello "pause" hello "pause" etc
House of beauties, this is the cutie.
if your a salesman hang up
To learn the facts about hair replacement, press 1
"I’m waaatching you" evil laugh, click.
Tampax tampon service, how may I help you?
"Hi." ... "Hi." ... "Hi." ... [repeat as needed]
(last name) deli, nobody can beat our meat.
bates motel.
let your answering machine do it
"Switchboard" Refuse to do anything until they give "correct password"
house of the lord god speaking
Mommy?
speak!
"your last name" ’s summer home, summer home, summer not.
*burp*
Hello China moon
Jello
Play AOL welcome sound
Red Chinese Embassy and Delicatessen switchboard, how may I direct your call?
Say ’sorry i have a call waiting’ wait, say hi again then hang up
You Rang?
\"GO to Hell!!!!!\"
"ABC Circumcision Clinic, you flop we chop"
"Hi... you have reached Madam Whiplash... you’ve been a very naughty boy!"
Good D**k, I deliver
Hey yall wutcha gunna say?.. who is this talkin to alex 2day?
Joe’s Pool Hall: you rack ’em, we crack ’em.
kill her. that’s all you have to do.
You are on a restricted CIA phone line! Get off now!
Hello? Yes I’ll have a 10 inch cheese and tomato with anchovies please.
Welcome to Palmers Garden Centre, you’re speaking with a Ho
You may commence speaking (wait really long time) NOW!
Fish market. Shark speaking.
yessssssssssssssssssssss!!!
"Dartford swmming pool. No jumping, shouting or piddling in the shallow end.
Blow a whistle into the telephone
"what are you wearin’?" (while breathing heavily)
For the nuclear terrorism department, please press 1.
"goodbye"
"Hello?" *BANG* "I’ve been shot..." *click*
we/re sorry the person you are calling is dead
if it’s female: "oooooh! it’s a lady!"
Hi, is Bob there?
National Secure Data Center. You’re on scramble line six. GO!
"You started it."
What you say !!
[my name]’s house of phat nasty lovin’
At the third tone, the time will be ...
"are you on a cell phone?!? prank call! prank call!!!"
"Hello, Jimmy’s Chicken Shack. Please hold..."
What do YOU want?!?!
"Hello. All your base are belong to us. How to help you may we?
na na na naaaaa... mindcrime
State your last name (most Europeans do this, and it makes sense)
This is Microsoft; where do you want to go today?
fsck off
no limit studio... uggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
If call ID says "Cmpgn to Relect the Pres." say "Grn Prty HQ, Nader spking."
F b 20, 2006 10:18 am - Thanks for the support guys. No it is not a long copy i either wrote them or got 5 or 6 at a time from another source. Trippalicious i am going to add "Ello Taco Bell" if you dont like it message me i will get rid of it.
Feb 20, 2006 10:30 am - great egg dude, my uncle has this divice that he hooks up to his fone (haha) and it tells him when tellamarketers are calling and he likes to awnswer using things like this, im gonna have to give him this list. 5*
Thank you for calling AT&T. Please listen to the following options and...
Ways to answer your phone
You have reached 555-1234. This number has been changed to 555-1234.
Feb 21, 2006 5:20 pm - Yes i really am a leprucaun and i do have a pot...................... .......................... .......................... ....of gold (kind of) okkay its just normal pot. the picture is like if you accidently called a retard and they went crazy and shot you.
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