How to tame wild creatures
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(26 votes)
Published: May 05, 2003 12:00 a.m.
Viewed 376 times |
Now, we all know the imortance of the need to train animals and slugs, so here I am to teach you all how to do it sucessfully. Now you may be a little frightened here, but trust me, I know what I am doing.
You know those little slices of cheese that you find in the supermarkets, the ones that are wrapped in plastic. Well what you don’t know it that when combined with poop they fuse to form a very strong bond to the animal kingdom. Now, get your poop cheese and strap it to your knee caps and walk up and down the street bumping in to old people and kissing them. Eventually you will find Jim, the local Hobo that will guide you on your quest to becoming the aminal master. Smear poop on your ears and do a few flips and land on the nearest blue car. Once upon the car, you can scream at the driver and he/she will flee in terror. Now once you have taken possesion of the vehicle, crank up the stero to the rocking sounds of Sweet Home Alabama and drive into the nearest forest where you will begin to make the animal obey your every command. Unleash your Onion, and make hooting noises. Soon all the animals will come to you, and they will vow to serve you. Now, you have yo find a girl and play the guitar to her. Once she hears your melody, she will want to make passionate love to you. Do this, and you will forever be know as the Animal Master.
Follow my words, my children, and oneday this dream will be yours. Use this knowledge wisely.
Onion Love,
Em |
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 | Jun 21, 2005 10:49 am -
how many hits of pot u on |
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