This group is for men only. If you have an idea for a man law put it in the forum and if there are 30 messages following it saying man law your law will be added to the list.
Current man laws:
1. The high five and the wave good bye have been replaced by an abrupt thrust while simultaneously pointing at the person with your elbows by your side. This law was put forth by Tyler Shealy and Daniel Mattox and quickly approved.
2. It has been made official that under no circumstances should the male have to pay for birth control (Daniel Mattox).
3. If your best friend is dumped by a girl it is a 6 month waiting period till she can be touched. If he breaks up with her its a 6 day waiting period. (Original Man Law)
4. If two or more males arrived at a party by a single car, and the driving male is hooking up with a girl, it is the responsibility of the other males to find other ways home.
(The exception to this law is if the driver is hooking up with his own girlfriend, the law is then void and the driver still holds full responsibility of driving his frinds home) (Brought forth by JT Carpenter)
5. Short shorts have been banned.. unless participating in a sporting event that demands shorter shorts. Also no real man should be allowed to pop his collar. (brought forth by Daniel Mattox and Justin Dozier)
6. Every man shall allow one empty urinal of separation in a bathroom with three or more urinals, law is void if there are dividers in between each urinal. (This law was put forth by Karl Schuchard)
7. If a girl and a guy are not officialy dating then it can’t be considered cheating. However...if the guy cheats with a girl that is less attractive to the one he is originally interested in then he is either... A) Drunk or B) Dumbass. This then gives the original girl the right to either get mad or laugh at you. (This law was put forth by Justin Widener)
8. No one should ever steal a man’s alcohol from that man’s cooler...this is the only law that suffers the penalty of death. (Brought forth by Daniel Mattox and Richard Troficanto)
9. When bringing condoms to a party it is a man’s responsibility to pack two in his pockets and one in his car as a spare incase a friend is in desperate need. (Brought forth by Daniel Mattox and Richard Troficanto)
10. No heavy fornication in a friend’s bed. (Brought forth by Daniel Mattox and Richard Troficanto)
11. Use of the word Canada is prohibited, the word shall be substituted with "the place above America" or any other variant of America such as, place above United States, The Stars and Stripes, and etc.. (Brought forth by JT Carpenter)
12. If another man’s fly is down, you didn’t see anything and may not make a comment about it. (This law was put forth by Karl Schuchard)
13. When a man is borrowing a buddies tool or other equipment, if the borrowie puts any scratches or brings it back with any noticable wear, then he is required to do one of the following: If the item costs under 50 bucks, you are required to replace it. If the item costs over 50 bucks, you are required to give him a case of beer, because hey...who wants to spend more than 50 bucks on something that isn’t yours. (Brought forth by Josh Horton)
14. When your friend picks up a hot girl...however the hot girl has an ugly friend (usually like Erin McComb)...it is only right that you operate as a wing man doing whatever it is you gotta do to help your buddy have some time alone with the hot girl. As men we are obligated to sacrifice and pay it forward for each other knowing that the favor will one day be repayed. (Put forth by Daniel Mattox)
15. When calling shotgun, all riders of the car must be outside, and shotgun can only be called when the car is in view. Riders in the car are not allowed to run to shotgun and steal it before the person who called and deserves it arrives there. The driver of the car has no authority to decide on who gets shotgun. If a legitimate confrontation comes up where the rightful owner of the shotgun can not be determined then it will be decided by one round of paper rock scissors (with no shoot). If the two contenders tie 5 times in a row then the rightful owner of the shotgun is to be decided by a UFC cage match in which the first blood drawn decides the rightful owner of shotgun. (Put forth by Paul Miller, with a little touch of Robbie Gaultness)
16. It is PAPER, ROCK, SCISSORS with no shoot. End of discussion.
17. When toasting with beers you clank with the bottom. (Original Man Law)
18. You poke it you own it. (Original Man Law)
19. The head nod is an acceptable way to greet another guy when simply walking past. No words are needed to be said. An upward nod is for friends, a downward nod is for fellow men. (Brought forth by Brad Turner)
20. If a man is on vacation to a state that does not border his own, or any other country, it is not considered cheating if he so chooses to engage in sexual activity with a girl other than his girlfriend. Although he should be fully aware that his girlfriend may not see eye to eye if she was to ever find out. (put forth by Sean wilson and JT Carpenter)
21. A man should not masturbate more than 3 times in a day to insure being ready for any unknown or known late night action. Assisting Girls does not count.. rule is in exception if male party is in a bet to set a record of number of times in a day. (put forth by Leland Brasic and Ben Stroud)
22. A man shall never wear any article of women’s clothing (I.E .. Girls Jeans/Pants!) unless they are the loser of such a bet.. or if a man is figuratively in a girls pants.. (or any other article of clothing).. (put forth by Robert Wilder and JT Carpenter)
23. No man in any circumstance, unless mocking a violater of this law, should pop his collar. (Brought forth by Justin Dozier)
24. A man should never be denied the right to adjust himself or place his hands down his pants under any circumstances. ( Brought forth by Luke Hillman)
25. Being gay is not allowed. All gay "people" lose the title of "man", they may be male but not manly. (brought by Tripp "Bo" Fulmer)
26. All men must eat meat. A shitload of meat. If not borderline carnivore. For no reason should a man ever be a vegitarian, or eat sick shit like tofu. In the case of sports such as wrestling dieting is permitted. Don’t be ashamed of the beer gut...be proud. (Brought forth by Kevin Huyghe)
27. Every man is required to learn some form of Poker before he dies. (Brought forth by Justin Dozier)
28. If a man ever does something wrong a simple "OOPS", "My Bad", or any variations of cuss words that get the point across will suffice, no need to say "I’m Sorry" (Brought forth by Brandon Lazarus)
29. No man should ever hook up with his best friend’s girl, no matter how hot she is. This is in effect while they are dating or "together." If they are seperated refer to Law 3 for the proper way to handle the situation. (Side Advice: Less guilt is involved if she comes on to you.)
30. Under no circumstance should any one man cockblock another mans attempt at getting some tang. Lets just leave that up to the tangs fat friend. (Brought Forth by Mike Cryer)
31. Every man should watch sportscenter at least once a day, though multiple viewings are recomended so that one can hold his own in any debate on sports that may arise that day. (Brought forth by Ben O’Connor)
32. Under no circumstances shall any man lay a hand on a female or a child in violence. Spanking of a woman’s ass or pulling of the hair is permitted if done on request. Corporal punishment is permitted excluding obvious extremes. (Brought forth by Stanton Jones)
33. If a woman is present whether family or friend no man under any circumstances shall make their own food or pour their own drinks unless it is a special holiday such as, Mother’s day, Birthday’s, or St. Patrick’s day or if the woman cannot keep up with the pace you want your drink poured. Law is void if significant grilling is involved. (Brough forth by JT Carpenter)
34. Cheerleading is not a sport. (Put forth by Will Carmichael)
35. Women can’t drive. (Put forth by S. Dooley)
36. In the court of Man Law the statement "I was Drunk" will have the same effect as an insanity plea (reduced punishment) in standard court provided the defendant’s blood alcohol level exceeds .10.
37. If any male is caught violating a Man Law in serious context, as a form of punishment he should be disowned of his manly name, only to receive the title of "Manbitch" from his peers and colleagues. Forgiveness is pending the severity of the broken law...or a case of beer to all his offended peers as a token of respect to what is manly...and what is not. (Daniel Ruzcko)
38. Any man that is old enough and is not in the army should at least support the troops, even if you dont agree with the war they are your country men fighting to protect you and you should show them your support (Brought forth by Austin Kahlstorf)
39. The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you’d know what I want!" gets an original Sega Genesis equipped with the games Road Rash, Street Fighter, and Madden 96 (Put forth by Robert Wilder).
40. Never speak in the middle of a Man’s back-swing (Put forth by Maxwell Mancuso).
41. Under no circumstances should two men share an umbrella.
42. Complaining about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s refrigerator is forbidden. You may gripe if the temperature is unsuitable.
43. Cameras are not permitted (Chris Tooley).
44. No man is ever required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering a friend’s birthday is strictly optional and slightly gay.
45. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a buffalo wing clean.
46. Spilling beer in the name of a joke is prohibited. Instead laugh at Jimmy Johnson’s hair (Original Manlaw).
47. All men should be required to watch the Superbowl and the World Series (Brought forth by Jonathan Levitt).
48. Unless discussion includes the game being watched, the sport being watched, and/or athletes participating in said game, no discussion shall be made during actual broadcast. Commercials are open to any form of discussion with the exception of Broadway musicals. Requests for more beer shall be made during commericials as well.
DOOR/WINDOW CLAUSE: Any interference with the line of sight from any man and the television during game broadcast is punishable with the "beer bitch" position for the remainder of said game, unless there is another culprit. Bathroom breaks are not an excuse. If you are not smart enough to go during the commercial, you do not reserve the right to disturb others’ viewing experiences. (Brought forth by Mike Stevens).
49. Every man should be prepared and willing to kill another man if that man fucks with, injures, or rapes another man’s family members. (Don’t mess with the man that brought forth this law...Paul Anderson).
50. Don’t watch Brokeback Mountain. We don’t give a shit about what your girlfriend says. (Richard Pruitt).
51. While political disagreement is tolerated, anyone who votes for Hillary Clinton forfeits any aspect of manliness. (Brought forth byMichael Bettis).
52. Don’t start a beer if you can’t finish it. If you leave an unfinished beer or aren’t man enough to finish it you will be labeled as "manbitch"...for a long time. (Brough forth by Tyler Gorman).
53. Unless you are assembling a rocket destined for space travel, an instruction manual is for absolute pussies who do not know their way around logic and reason. This holds especially true for any and all football video games. (Put forth by Brian Delehanty).
54. In the event that your buddy is in a bar fight it is your job to 1)back him up or 2) if it is a fight that your are 100% sure you cant win then get you and your buddies’ asses out of there before you get put in a hospital. (Put forth by Brandon Lazarus).
55. It is in no way acceptable to kiss a girl after you have blown one in her mouth. THIS IS LIKE KISSING YOUR OWN DICK. Exceptions are a 2 hour wait, full course meal, or brushing of the teeth/listerine usage. (Sincerely...Ralph Michalowski).
56. Men should know how to drive a stick shift. (Brought forth by Mike Delgado).
57. Every man should, by the time he dies own at least one firearm unless state laws interfere, in which case the man must have at least gone shooting with his buddies. (Brought forth by Keith Lind).
58. Bros before Hoes. No man shall ever choose a woman over his friends or the Man Laws, especially in an uncool sense. This includes ditching your friends during manly events, such as watching/going to "the game", or even showing blantent disregard for the laws we have all set forth. As men we must stand united. Exceptions are (1) if the "hoe" has enough (attractive) friends for each guy, (2) when virginity can be lost (yours or hers), and (3) when the girlfriend/wife is pregnant with your child.
(Brough forth by Bryan Church).
59. When riding with a fellow man...don’t fuck with his radio unless granted permission. (Justin Dozier).
60. If a man is dumped by his girl, it is his buddies sworn duty to help the dumped man find a revenge lay of equal or greater hotness than the girl who did the dumping. This should be carried out as soon as possible for greatest revenge factor. (Put forth by George Gaynor).
61. With the exception of handshakes with the elderly and women, a man must go into the shake with all his strength. the shake should be relatively short, and once a loss in pressure is detected, the shake should be ended immediately. (Served up by Tim Burnham).
62. All men should be able to recite at least 2-3 Man laws upon command, this is to show that as men we have knowledge of the laws that we live our lives by. (Put forth by Austin Maynard).
63. No man may give himself a nickname (such as THE KING). It must be earned, and given to him by others.
(Brought forth by Richard Behmer).
64. Don’t talk with a girlfriend or a potential girlfriend when your hanging out with your friends. Short conversations to let each other know where your at is fine and even then you need to be discrete. A rare exception is if your buddys unanimously agree that the girl is a 9.6 or hotter on the "hottness scale." (Put forth by Stephen Dunnigan).
65. Men do not become "cold" when outdoors under any circumstances, nor do they use the word "chilly". If a man feels the urge to become warmer, this is actually the brain’s way of saying to the rest of the body "I need more beer." (Well said by Wayne Emington).
66. Don’t poke other guys on facebook. Just don’t. (Brought forth by Justin Moore).
67. Being a member of any branch of the United States Armed Forces guarantees you irrevocable manhood and protection from ever being dubbed "manbitch." Automatic revocation of manhood status is applied to any who resign or are discharged before their full term is served.
Here’s to the men who serve our country. We bask in the hopes that we could ever be as manly as you.
68. Simply said, every man must be able to unhook a bra, in a timely manner with one hand in a manner that doesn’t affect the woman’s opinion of your performance in a negative manner (Sean Reich).
Dec 15, 2006 9:21 pm - Just kuz you wer the first to ask about being a mod im going to make you one. And guys tell everyone on your friends list to koin the group so we can get some more members
Aug 28, 2007 9:39 pm - 1. Man Law Is NEVER Wrong...If An Argument Is Present We Agree To Disagee.
2. A man shall not wear the colors of a championship team unless there is documented proof on file that named man wore such colors before the start of the season.
3. It is only acceptable to complain of a sports injury if it will get you pity sex within one hour
4. You NEVER discuss with your girlfriend what goes on on guys night out.
5. It is acceptable to settle important decisions by using Rock, Paper, Scissors.
6.The woman should never drive the man’s car, unless he is busy puking out the window.
7. When a friend moves in with his girlfriend, he loses his man card until said relationship is over.
8. Thou shall not make plans with the guys and then cancel for a chick...unless chick is really hot and has hot friends which would then benefit everyone.
9. Anything said and done in the company of male friends, is kept there and never shared with curious females.
10. If a buddy gets stuck talking to the fat chick at a party, under no circumstances are you allowed to leave his side.
11. If a man has relations with a chick who is "not up to par" said man can call "mulligan" and the incident shall never to be spoken of again. (only one mulligan per year)
12. The man who approaches a table full of women gets first dibs.
13. A man should never be told to put the toilet seat down, furthermore the toilet seat should be lifted after a female is done.
14. If a man’s friend calls at 3 am needing a ride, you pick him up.
15. Man will not go to a chick flick with his girl friend or a girl unless he is guaranteed play during or after the movie. Woman must also pay for man’s time.
16. If a single man is hosting a party single woman should always out number single men 2 to 1. There should be no couples
17. No Man May Change A T-Shirt Because "This One Is Wrinkled" Instead Wear It Or Iron It While It Is Still On You.
18. A Man May Not Own A Pleasure Device, Even If The Man Can Not Do The Job On His Own Or It Has Been Two Weeks Without A Woman. Especially If The Device Is Made Of Silly Putty.
19. If Ever Another Man Finds Another Man Breaking A Man Law, Said Man Is Subject To Being Hit In The Head With A Phonebook.
20. No Man Shall Let A "Female Friend" Move In With Him During Her Breakup With Another Man While She "Looks For Her Own Place"
21. Men May Not Wear Tight Pants Or Capri Pants. Exceptions Include Football Or Any Other Sport Deemed Manly.
22. Real Men Do Not Love Sex, Real Men Enjoy Sex. Love And Sex Are Two Diffrent Things.
23. A Man Can Not Carry A Little Dog In Public, Especially In A Bag.
24. No Man Shall Subject His Pet To The Humiliation Of Wearing Any Clothing Including Hats Or Sunglasses. Extreme Penalties Result In Such.
25. Mans Dog Is Part Of Mans Family Therefore Dog Is Allowed To Sleep On Bed. Good Call.
26. It Is Completely Acceptable For Man To Use A Dog To Lure A Woman.
27. No Man Shall Say The Word "Cuddle" Unless It Is To Score A PERFECT 10 Girl.
28. Man Will Not Take Woman’s Last Name In Marriage.
29. If Talking To Your Girlfriend Or Wife On The Phone You Are Not Permitted To Use A "Pet Name" In Presence Of Another Man.
30. A Man’s Friend Shall Not Let A Man Go Back To A Woman Who Left Him At The Alter...Unless She Is REALLY Hot.
31. During Football. The Time For Woman Is During Every OTHER Commercial Break.
32. Man Shall Not Date Another Friend’s Ex, Once Said Relationship Is Over She Is Gone And Not To Be Brought Back Into Your Group.
33. Your Best Friend Should Never Sell You Out, A Real Man Always Returns The Favor.
34. Man Shall Never Call A Woman Who Is Just His Friend Unless It Is For The Sole Purpose Of Hanging Out To Become "Closer" Friends.
35. Shotgun Is To Be Called When The Vehicle Is In View, Not While Your Still In The Building.
36. No Man Shall Be Driving A Mini Van Unless That Is The Only Vehicle Available To Carry Everyone To The Liqour Store.
37. Unless It Is Your Mother, Sister, Aunt,Or Grandma, Man Does Not Say I Love You In Public.
38. Mans Mother Is Always A Saint.
39. Man Will Pass These Man Laws On To Everyone. Child Is Able To Start Learning Man Laws Once He Can Walk.
40. When Man Hangs Out With His Father, All Previous Disagreements Are Null And Void.
41. To Those Men Who Discipline Their Children With Spanking, If A Woman Attempts To Stop You From Disciplining Your Child, You Make Sure She Knows Who The Woman Is.
42. If She Does Not Tell You Her Age, Age Is Not An Issue.
43. If In A Bar And A Soldier Is In Uniform Said Man Is To Buy Soldier A Beer, UNLESS You Are Within 10 Miles Of A Navy Base Or Something In Those Regards.
44. When At A Movie Theater With Another Man, There Shall Be An Empty Seat Between The Two Of You. No Exceptions.
45. No Man Shall Ever Have To Explain Or Apologize For Not Calling Another Man Back.
46. No Man Shall Become Friends With An Exgirlfriend When The Relationship Went Out In Thunder Strikes Unless She Is Putting Out And It Has "Been Awhile".
47. Man should not wear shorts above his knees.
48. Man shall not count or cut coupons.
49. No Man Shall Use Another Man’s Facebook Group To Degrade Another Man To Lure Women Into Speaking To Him. For That Makes Him Gay.
50. A Man Should Never Insult A Lady, Even If He Is Just Joking Around.
51. If It’s The Last Period, Quarter, Half, Inning, Or Hold In Any Sporting Event, Women Are Forbidden To Speak To Us.
52. If The Remote Is Laying In Another Man’s Lap, Under No Circumstances Is Another Man Allowed To Grab The Remote.
53. A Man Shall Never "Do It" In His Friends Bed Without Prior Permission From That Friend.
54. If Two Men Pass Each Other In A Hallway You Must Give The Nod Or The Pat On The Back If You Are Both In The Same Popularity Level.
55. No Man Shall Ever Let His Wife Or Girlfriend Or Other Woman Speak For Him On His Outgoing Voicemail Unless The Female Voice Is Hot Enough To Get Off To.
56. No Man May Glue Crystals Or Any Sort To His Cell Phone Or MP3 Player.
57. While Trying On Pants At The Store, A Man Should Never Ask Another Man How He Looks Wearing These Pants.
58. Clothes That Pass The "Smell Test" Are Acceptable To Wear Even If Unwashed For A Long Time.
59. Under No Circumstances Will A Man Pop His Collar.
60. No Man Shall Hold A Shopping Bag By The Handles, But Shall Instead Fold Said Bag And Carry It Like A Football.
61. Men Do Not Go Shopping. We Go Buying.
62. No Man Shall Take More Than 45 Minutes To Do Their Christmas Buying.
63. When doing manual labor in the presence of women, it is considered stylish to appropriate to flew more than usual.
64. Highlights Are For Sportscenter, Not Your Hair.
65. If You get A Bad Hair Cut, You Are To Wear A Hat Or Suck It Up And Take It From Your Friends.
66. Men Will Not Wax Any Part Of Their Body.
67. No Man May Compliment Another Man On His Physical Looks Or Attire.
68. Every man Will Shower Before Going To A Bar With Other Male Friends To Pick Up Females.
69. If No Women Are Around, Your Belches Should Be As Loud And Long As Possible.
70. No Man Shall Ever Give The Hand Shake That Could Be Compared To That Of A Woman.
71. A Man Shall Never Say Whoever Smelled Ot Dealt It, Always Claim Your Own.
72. No Man Shall Ever Drive A Car With Spinner Hubcaps.
73. No Man Shall Operate A Vehicle With His Left Knee Bent Up And Foot On The Seat.
74. You Can Not Bet Less Than $5 On A Game.
75. A Man Must Finish A Poker Game Or Lose All His Chips, He May Never Leave In The Middle Of A Game.
76. No Exscuses. Play Like A Champion.
77. Man is to open door for woman only if woman is confirmed non-feminist, if she is a femenist she can open her own door.
78. Man Is To Show A Woman That Man Is Better Than Woman But Is To Never Strike Or Harm A Female.
79. The ONLY Acceptable Time To Wear A Wrist/Sweat Band Is During a Sporting Event.
80. When relaying information about a sporting event, get the statistics and/or de5criptions right, or dont bother to pass the information along.
81. Your best friend is dumped by his girlfriend. Six months before you can ask her outbut only if she is drop-dead gorgeous.
82. If you bring "beverage" to a party and not all of it is consumed, you can take the remainder with you as you leave the party as follows: Tuck Rule: One beer max, but only if the beer will fit in your pocket.
83. If a friend gets you a beer from the bar, it is not acceptable for the friend to stick his finger in the opening to bring back several beers to the table at once, get your own drink or use the gaps inbetween the fingers.
84. When toasting with beer, clink with the bottom, because clinking the top would qualify as kissing.
85. The high five is played out, but a continuance has been issued until a replacement can be found.
86. It is not permissible to hide your beer in the fridge so that others can’t find it, sharing is caring.
87. Wireless phone headsets, is technology gone bad: anything that makes you look like a crazy person - not cool.
88. The garage fridge is for beer only, a wife or girlfriend cannot store items other than beer in the garage fridge.
89. The five second food rule applies, as long as you can blow the shrapnel off prior to eating.
90. When describing the size of a fish you caught, it is expected that you will exaggerate the dimensions with hand gestures, but you cannot lie about the weight.
91. Men do not throw eachother birthday parties, they buy eachother beer.
92. The frozen dinner is an acceptable meal when a man is alone and left to his own devices.
93. A man may own and operate a riding lawnmower if his yard exceeds that of a quarter of an acre of land.
94. A man does not say autumn, a man says fall.
95. It is always acceptable for a man to cannonball into a pool, anytime, any circumstances, no exceptions.
96. Men cannot cheat at pool, darts or poker.
97. A man shall never apologize or explain why he never called another man back.
98. If a man has a car that can lay rubber, he is obligated to do that from time to time.
99. A man caught speaking baby talk to his wife and/or girlfriend over the phone shall be subject to ridicule for at least one football game, and is the designated food deliverer for the said games.
100. If a borrowed tool is damaged, or receives any noticable wear, it is to be replaced with a new one without comment.
101. If a mans friend calls him at 3AM, you pick him up wherever he is, no questions.
102. If you compliment a guys six pack, you had better be talking about his choice of beverage.
103. A man to man phonecall can last no longer than 5 minutes, no exceptions.
104. Salmon is a food, not a color.
105. A man must never refer to the appearance of another mans wife, be it negative or positive.
106. All injuries are treatable by walking it off, and/or rubbing some dirt on it.
107. Women who claim to "love sports" must be considered spies until they have proven knowledge of said sport.
108. No man shall give himself his own nickname.
109. It is only okay to use another mans remote with verbal permission.
110. Grilling, regardless of weather conditions, should always be the first choice for cooking.
111. A man shall never fill his championship bracket on the basis of which teams mascot would win in a fight.
112. If somebody accidentally drinks from your beer it is now their beer and they must get you a new one.
113. A bet is a bet and must be paid under any circumstances no matter how embarassing or destructive the outcome may be.
114. If another man leaves "beverage" in your fridge, he has no more than 24hrs to claim said beverage, or said beverage is now yours.
115. Shut The Door.
116. A man purse is still a purse, and therefore not permitted.
117. No man shall have to purchase the beer for the night if they party is at his house.
118. The word football will never be used in place of soccer in america.
119. If you’ve known a man for longer than a week his sister is off limits, no matter how hot. *see also rule 124
120. Body paint on a man is only acceptable on gameday in support of his favorite team.
121. Yes, no and okay are perfectly good answers to any question.
122. Under no circumstances can the same man be made to go on a beer run more than once during the same gathering.
123. Upon approaching other man watching a sporting event, it is acceptable to ask the score of the game, but not who is playing.
124. You can only date a friends sister if you can A) take him in a fight B) give him your sisters number, or C) offer him lifetime tickets to his favorite teams games.
125. Bringing a female to a boys night out is punishable by verbal abuse for the rest of the night.
126. Anytime you agree to exchange hits to any part of the body and you administer the first hit you must not do anything to avoid or lessen the pain of the hit coming to you.
127. If you do not sweat it is not a sport.
128. A man shall not bet against his own team under any circumstance.
129. There is a 15 minute maximum for a man to prepare himself to go out for the night.
130. A man shall never give up on his team until they are officially eliminated.
131. A man takes out the garbage.
132. Remember that looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun, quick glances.
133. No man is to wear a beret unless it is required for his services.
134. There are NO leftovers when eating steak.
135. A man has bragging rights if his team defeats the team of another until the next meeting of the two teams.
136. It is completely acceptable for a man to use a dog as a wingman.
137. No more than 40% of the time spent in the gym may be on cardio, men lift weights.
138. Your house, your rules.
139. A man may never use the word fabulous. Instead, a man must use the words cool, sweet or awesome.
140. When walking in public, right of way applies. Slow walkers must stay to the side.
141. When a high five is necessary, a man may never leave a fellow man hanging.
142. No man shall wear socks that consist of individual toe slots.
143. During the summer months at least 75% of all meals should be cooked on a grill, with a beer in one hand and cooking utensil in the other.
144. Never throw out a baseball hat.
145. Foul balls are to be caught in the air, not retrieved.
146. No man shall ever compliment another man on the softness of his hands.
147. If you buy the first round, you have hte choice of who buys the next.
148. Every man must specialize in knowledge or skill of some sport.
149. You can take the last beer or the last wing, but not both.
150. Men pull pranks.
151. A man shall not don the colors of a championship team lest he has documented proof he wore them prior to the start of the season.
152. Men must choose other men over women unless special circumstances decree otherwise.
153. In an elevator, a man shall never face anywhere but toward the door.
154. Discussions about sports uniforms shall not exceed 35 seconds unless debating the coolness of throwback jerseys.
155. Acquire tans by accident, NEVER by credit card.
156. While sports debates between guys can be as long as needed to settle the argument, it is satisfactory to use one sentence, and no more than one sentence, to explain the complex debate to any inquiring woman.
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