DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME : Rotteneggs.com text files and message bases are for INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. DO NOT undertake any project based upon any information obtained from this or any other web site.We are not responsible for, nor do we assume any liability for, damages resulting from the use of any information on this site.
(108 votes) Published: Dec 29, 2006 8:09 a.m. In 6 Favorites Lists Viewed 398 times
There are plenty of eggs about fakeing sick to get out of school to go around! But what about that tradgic moment when you realize you have a cold coming on? Need to study for an exam? Going to a soccor tournament on thursday? Girlfriend coming ’round to dinner?
Not a problem!
With these easy steps, you and your cold will be apart before you can say "Uhhh...I feel like shit."
Here are some basic rules of thumb to keep in mind;
1. All the tea you have in your house is never enough!
That’s right, you should be drinking at least three cups a day, four if you are serious about getting better within 30 hours. Remember, black tea is good, but green tea is much healthier. If you want, you can alternate between different kinds. Point is, tea in general will help. Tea stimulates the germ defence mechanisms in your body. Shitloads of tea here, people!
2. Vitamin C is your friend
Try it, it really does help. And it’s easier to get than you may think. Vitamin C suppliment pills help, but alot of people don’t absorb the nutrients properly. The best way to get it is straight the way mother nature made it: in veggies. Now I am not asking you to eat your brocoly, but oranges, tangerines and grapes are all rich in vitamin C.
3. Cayenne pepper: an underestimated germ killer
I reserve this stuff for the days when my I-feel-sick -o-meter reaches the max. Cayenne pepper may taste like shit, may smell like shit, and after the right circumstances, look like shit. But this stuff is very effective at healing you. Take a quarter/a half a teaspoon full of Cayenne pepper, put it in a bottle full of water, and shake before drinking. Note: may cause a horrible burning sensation in the back of the throat.
4. Stay warm
Throw on an extra sweater, or just go sit in front of the fireplace (if you have one). By keeping your body warm for it, you basically allow it to put more energy into fighting the germs, instead of heating itself.
5. He who laughs first feels better
Many people don’t know this, but laughing releases chemicals into your body which speed up many of the functions in your body - including the anti-germ system. People who laugh lots tend to heal faster according to studies, and some people have even gotten over major diseases with it. Go rent Ace Ventura: Pet detective, flip on the Comedy Network, anyting hilarious. It will also make you feel better, which makes being really sick less of a downer.
6. Eat healthy
No sugary crap, just what yo’ momma told ya.
Thank you for reading this! I hope the next time you feel really sick (and wish you weren’t for whatever reason) then just follow these steps to get well.
Please rate fairly, this took alot of time to write. Get well soon!