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(72 votes) Published: May 12, 2003 12:00 a.m. In 1 Favorites Lists Viewed 227 times
Get a friend that is a friendly friend. Now you can belong in your place without feeling down!
Later for the rhyming! We’ve got no time to spare!
First you must buy a box of 100 sheet protectors (A4) to cover your hand in. You may even be able to fit both hands in one sheet protector. If you can, don’t, you need to use two sheet protectors for reasons explained later. Go to your local dictionary store. If any body see’s you, make a run for it Bob! But, BUT if every body doesn’t see you, you’re safe. Once inside the store, ask for 3 chicken wings and a sponge (remembering that you must stay out of sight.) Reach over the counter with all your free hands and grab your wings and book, put the wings in your LEFT pocket (most dictionary stores are out of the kind of book you asked for.) Now if you didn’t get seen and are at a good fitness level, run for it Bob! While you run quickly stay out of sight and take the chicken wings from your left pocket with your right hand. Taking the wings out with your right hand will make you look super cool. Now, still staying out of the demon eyes of the smelly public, pass one chicken wing to your left hand and one to your mouth.
You might want to get a drink from a bubbler in the nearby park obviously! Find a phone booth and (now for the important stuff) get changed into your sheet protectors. Now you can jump straight up, force off the roof with your head and begin your long flying journey home. It may take up to 3 whole minutes! But it will seem like less seen how you are flying and all. When you get home, take out the spare sheet protectors and get ready for something very tricky! Grab hold of the chicken wing in your LEFT hand and pull off the sheet protector by the open end so that the chicken wing ends up inside the sheet protector. Do the same with the other hand and once you’ve done both, hold out an empty sheet protector and drop the chicken wing out of your mouth in to it (you now understand the concept of the sheet protectors! To stop the grease getting on your hand.) Run like the bird that Wild E Cyote can’t catch to the trash can outside and throw all the sheet protectors in there as quickly as you can. And yes, you guessed it, even the ones you are wearing! Now go back inside and thank your friend. If he asks why, just tell him you’re just a civillian doing his bit for society and give him a big smile like this :D then say thank you again in a quiet, understanding tone.
And remember, that house isn’t safe for a pope like him you idiot! It needs more air holes.
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