Drive Thru Radio Revenge!
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(45 votes)
Published: Nov 21, 2003 12:00 a.m.
In 1 Favorites Lists
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This goes out to all you amateur radio operators. Ill explain the best I can, though a ham radio operator would know more.
The drive-thru intercom has a base unit thats connected to the speaker with wires. The base unit receives the sound from the speaker outside ("I want a Crappy Meal, please, you jabronies",) and transmits it over the airwaves to all the jabronies wearing headsets. The headsets have 2 buttons on them, perhaps labelled A and B. Button B allows the headset wearer to talk to the other headset-wearing jabronies ("Check out the tits on this chick at the window",) while button A will allow the wearer to talk on the speaker outside ("Sorry, were out of Crappy Meals, you wanker.",) while the other headsets listen in.
Now, the base unit transmits at a very low frequency, perhaps 10 megahertz, which is picked up by the headsets. The headsets always transmit at a higher freqency, about 55 megahertz, regardless of whether the wearer is pressing A or B. How, then, does the intercom system know whether or not to put the headset jabronies voice on the speaker outside? Because button A also puts a low-frequency tone on top of the voice. The tone is lower then humans can hear. The base unit hears the tone, and sends the transmission to the speaker.
You will need to know the headset frequency. Look up "fast food frequencies" on a search engine. Youll need the tone frequency. Youll need a transceiver thats been modified to transmit at the headset frequency. The modification usually involves cutting a wire inside. If you are a licensed radio operator, do not drive to the scene with the custom license plate on your car that displays your callsign. Remember how hard you had to work to get your operators licence? It will be yanked if youre caught. If you do it right, you will be able to hear the jabronies talk on the speaker and talk to each other. You will not be able to hear the swine (customer) talking at the speaker, but you will be able to talk to them, and to the jabronies.
I knew a bloke who was an operator. His transceiver could transmit at 5 watts, more than powerful enough to knock those little half-watt headset transceivers off the air. We pulled in behind the place, out of view of the people inside, and monitored the drive thru lane. A guy pulled in, driving a butt-ugly yellow Toyota.
Jabronie: Welcome to McFickups, may I take your order? (we could hear them on the transceiver in the car)
Bloke: WHAT!? (everything my bloke friend said on the transceiver could be heard on the headsets, and would blast LOUDLY on the speaker outside)
Jabronie: Can I help you?
(we couldnt hear the schmuck trying to order, so we paused briefly, then interrupted)
Bloke: 6 tacos and 3 cheeseburgers? No wonder youre so damn fat!
Jabronie: Im sorry, can you repeat your order?
Bloke: Get your fat, lazy azz out of the car. By the way, FZCK YOU!
Jabronie: Could you please pull to the window?
(we waited for the next customer, a decent looking female in a powder-blue Honda)
Jabronie: Welcome to McFickups-- (interrupted)
Bloke: Welcome to McFickups, may I fondle your tits?
(brief pause, the customer probably said something like "Excuse me?)
Jabronie: Im sorry, can I take your order?
Bloke: Can I take off your panties and lick your scungehole?
Jabronie: Could you please repeat your order?
Bloke: You like the taste of jism, dont you?
Jabronie: Could you please pull up to the window?
(customer pulls away, and there are no other customers)
Jabronie: Quit messing with me!
We howled with laughter, and left before the authorities could arrive. |
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 | Sep 28, 2005 8:00 pm -
i did something like this to McDonalds. i knew the guy who was taking my order, so he asked me what i wanted and i said for him to "step off my nuts bitch." all of a sudden another voice out of nowhere said "excuse me!?" so i told her to hold on then i finished my order. |
 | Oct 08, 2005 7:25 pm -
Nice egg. |
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