DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME : Rotteneggs.com text files and message bases are for INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. DO NOT undertake any project based upon any information obtained from this or any other web site.We are not responsible for, nor do we assume any liability for, damages resulting from the use of any information on this site.
(119 votes) Published: Dec 28, 2007 5:52 a.m. In 1 Favorites Lists Viewed 922 times
Now as a card carrying out gay girl, I have been asked by countless girls and guys about sex toys. It’s like I’m Sue fracking Johanson or something.
It’s just embarrassing to be asked by a guy friend you hardly know...and then having to mentally visualize his gf.
And now on to the serious egg! (Yeah, about photos - I’m not going to show you my stash.)
Difference Between A Dildo and a Vibrator
A vibrator has a motor built in and some type of power source. (Either batteries or mains power.) Vibrators can either be for internal or external simulation or even both.
A dildo is made up of one piece and is generally used for internal simulation. Some dildos have space at the end for an addition of a small vibrating bullet to add functionality.
Length or Width?
Guys...it’s time for a truth to come out. Length doesn’t matter! Any given girl can feel the immediate difference in width/girth...so let’s consider the circumferance of any toy.
Most sites list the toy’s size in inches. Here’s an easier way - an inch is two fingers inside your girl. An inch and a half is three fingers.
G-SPOT SIMULATION
Some toys are curved to hit a girl’s graftenburg (sp?) spot, or the spot that can cause female ejaculation. These toys are not recommended for the beginner as each girl has a different body layout. (The curve is sometimes too short or too long, and the material of the toy needs to be very firm.)
Start your girlfriend off with finger play to familiarize her with the sensations of g-spot play.
ANAL SIMULATION
Toys designed for anal simulation have a flare/curve at the bottom to prevent "losing it". They are usually smaller in circumferance and they need a lot of thicker lube to get started. Some of these anal simulation toys have small bullet vibes to make them vibrate.
Start small and work up. (And use a lot of lube.)
Smooth or Textured?
Now this is harder to decide, as your girlfriend and you actually want to experiment with the toys themselves first.
Beginners are advised to try out the more basic models first, then work up with the odd ball things that they might sell.
REALISTIC - veins, balls (usually called a base in shops),
SEMI-REALISTIC - veins, realistic skin texture, rotating pearls in the skin
WTF - soft spikes, thumping motors (lol, a subwoofer in your toy!)
LUBRICATION
Now on to the touchy subject of lubrication. Some girls feel like shit when they can’t produce enough natural lubrication to allow penetration. Don’t! Some ladies are naturally a bit dry - and need a bit of help in that department.
WATERBASED - this stuff turns sticky as it dries. Decent for short play, and easy to clean up. Usually made with glyercin (flavourless jelly) so it’s a bit sweet. An example of a brand is KY Jelly.
SILICON - this stuff is the motherload. It doesn’t dry easily, is slicker than an used car salesman and doesn’t damage silicon toys. But it’s usually a bit more expensive than the rest.
GLYERCIN-FREE - good for vegans, less of an odd taste, somewhat decent lube, and sometimes is a bit thicker than standard lube. An example of this would be Slippery Stuff.
FLAVOURED - please generally avoid. These things are for novelty value, and they usually taste like cough syrup...there are worse things that a girl’s nether regions to taste.
CLEANING TOYS
There are sites that sell sex toy cleaners out there. Don’t buy it. All you need is water and antiseptic hand soap to clean most toys. Be careful of getting the damn battery compartment wet. (I find a bag rubberbanded over the compartment works well to protect it.)
** Silicon dildos can be boiled to be sterilized.
SHARING TOYS
Some porn makes me wince; really it does. Especially, when someone goes from anal play to vaginal play without cleaning fingers/toy/changing the damn condom/or taking a shower first. That’s a surefire way to give your girlfriend the nastiest infection of her life. You don’t want that, do you?
Also, use a condom when sharing toys, especially plastic ones. These can absorb bacteria and viruses and even boiling them can’t get rid of all the nasties completely.
WHERE TO BUY
You might have a couple of these in your town. Check and phone each store to see if they are to your liking.
goodforher.com - Female run site, and the brick and mortar store has female only hours. Very low key and not tacky in any way.
stagshop.com - A chain store, but slightly edgier and can scare away most girls. Best to order online.
No it’s not; RE is full of virgins. I would have reposted my guide on getting laid which was deleted with my old account but I get bitched at when I repost eggs (even though they’re better than anyone else’s).
No it’s not; RE is full of virgins. I would have reposted my guide on getting laid which was deleted with my old account but I get bitched at when I repost eggs (even though they’re better than anyone else’s).
I forget its hard to portray sarcasm on the internet.. though I felt it was fairly obvious :P
Dec 28, 2007 5:15 pm - RE isn’t filled with old lonely lesbian sluts, like you, we’re filled with 13 year old virgins,like me. Only inadequate 13 year olds virgins would allow their slut to use this. I pleasure and beat my woman so they don’t have to worry about sticking shit up their shitter and pisser.
Dec 29, 2007 10:55 am - Hey straight girls use this too. You want your woman to go out and get a random std or would you like to introduce her to toys?
Dec 30, 2007 2:12 am - its ok i got a kick out of it and a quick note to you last coment
my girls dont need toys or a stud why you ask cuz im a fucking stalin baby you know get up on that ass and beat up them cheeks like a beast
o ya a little tip for you never question a guys manhood ok thats how people die any way 4**
Edit Page
Message vicevixen
Add Comment
Add to Favorites
Email to Friend
