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(39 votes) Published: May 01, 2004 12:00 a.m. In 1 Favorites Lists Viewed 4960 times
Take your name off the Do Not Call list because after you read this, you’re going to love getting called by telemarketers!!
Telemarketing
Tell them you are very interested in their offer, But that you are very busy at the moment. Ask for their home number, and tell them you will call them there later. When they say ’’No, sorry blahblahblah’’ Then say to them sternly "OH, so you don’t want anyone bothering you at home huh? Then how do you think we feel?" and hang up.
Tell them "Hold on. I am going to get the cordless phone, so I can continue this conversation while I use the restroom." Pause for a second or two and then continue. If they didn’t hang up, make grunting sounds plopping and make sure you flush the toilet a few times. If they don’t hang up by now, make comments like "I don’t remember eating corn?" and "can someone get me some toilet paper." If that doesn’t get them, then tell them to call back later because the toilet overflowed and you need to clean it up.
If you know you are being called by a scam telemarketer. Act all surprised and stuff. If they offer a trip to Florida, or to somewhere where there is a beach, ask them if they have wheelchair access to the beach. Tell them you are a homosexual and very publicly affectionate (if they are the same sex tell them they sound cute over the phone or something.) If the prize is money, tell them that you are not interested in their "chump change" or "pocket change" and that wouldn’t even cover one of your all night party expenses.
I like to keep them on the line as long as I can to waste their time. If a question they ask requires an immediate response, tell them to hold for a minute to answer the door. Wait 5 minutes then pick back up and tell them to repeat what they were just talking about. Keep it going for as long as you can. When they spend all that time on you and they don’t get a sale they (or their employer) lose money.
If they are selling a product, ask if it is made in Taiwan or Japan (etc..), if it is give them a lecture about child slave labor, and how you lost your job to an overseas company.
Screw with their minds. When they call, ask them if they will do the work on a dirt house. Ask if the maintaince guys would mind retrieving your 2 pet slugs that escaped into the basement, and have since multiplied.
You can also tell them you’re not allowed to talk to anyone until your assault case has been heard. Then just hang up.
Another solution is to ask the telemarketer for his/her home phone number. They will probably ask you why you need their home number, or something to that effect, just tell them you want to think over buying the product and will call them when you make up your mind [probably around 3AM.]
Pretend to be really fired up about their product. Then, when the time comes to close the purchase, try to use your Sears card or Zellers card something that is not viable currency, then insist that the company is at fault for not taking that card.
Aug 08, 2006 4:45 pm - Fun things to do when you are a telemarketer: call other telemarketers offering your stuff and take turns offering eachother stuff
Aug 08, 2006 4:46 pm - Fun things to do when you are a telemarketer: call other telemarketers offering your stuff and take turns offering eachother stuff we like when you waste our time... we get to laugh after and we still get paid!
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