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Throw your best jokes/insults
   
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FluffyLuffy-8285


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Egg Points: 273
Posts: 44
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Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:21 p.m. - Subject: Throw your best jokes/insults

The topic says it all.

Here’s one my friend just told me.

A blond, brunette, and a red head are in a docters office waiting for their pregnancy test to come back.

The Brunette says, " I’m gonna have a boy!"
" How do you know?" asked the other two.
"I was on top", the Brunette explained

Then Redhead says, "I’m gonna have a girl!"
" How do you know?" asked the other two.
"I was on bottom", the Redhead explained

"OMG, I’m gonna have puppies!" Screams the Blond


lmao^^



BLOCKED, EXPIRES Feb 02, 2010

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:24 p.m. - Subject:

Why did so few Negroes vote for Jesse Jackson?


Because he promised them jobs.


Shploits


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Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 7269
Posts: 1044

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:25 p.m. - Subject:

How do you stop a dumb, deaf and blind kid from ratting you out for rape?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell her mum.

Why don’t blondes like birth control?
They keep falling out

A paedophile and a young girl are walking through the woods together and the girl tells the paedo she’s scared; he rolls his eyes and tuts before saying "What do you think it’s gonna be like for me? I’ve gotta walk back through here on my own."

Can’t be bothered to post anymore, they’re my faves.



Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:26 p.m. - Subject:

Womens rights.


Shploits


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Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 7269
Posts: 1044

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:27 p.m. - Subject:

Quote:
Womens rights.

HAHA!


Shploits


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Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 7269
Posts: 1044

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:28 p.m. - Subject:

What do you do if you see your TV floating at night?
Get your gun and shout "drop it nigger!"



Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:30 p.m. - Subject:

Quote:
Why are niggers getting stronger?
T.V.s are getting bigger! -tim

rofl.


How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on the bed?



Put velcro on the ceiling



How do you get him down?




Tell a couple Mexican kids that he’s a pinata


the1337


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Member Lvl: 10
Egg Points: 9327
Posts: 1068
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Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:31 p.m. - Subject:

Two black people are in a car, whos driving?


The cop


Kapraxis


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Member Lvl: 20
Egg Points: 2340957
Posts: 972

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:32 p.m. - Subject:

Two friends are down on their luck with the ladies and decide to give blind dating a try by hooking each other up. With the confidence to ask out a girl on someone else’s behalf, for there is no fear of personal rejection, they both find a date that would be good for the other. To make it more casual, they set up a time for all 4 people to meet, making a reservation at a local pub style diner.

The night wears on, and everyone is halving a good time. The women are gorgeous, and both friends feel that they have scored. So much so, in fact, that when both women leave to the bathroom neither guy is to worried.

"Prolly talking about how great we are," says one. The other nods, and holds up his hand for the traditional ’score’ high five. Two hands collide, knocking one off balance. As he falls to the floor, his friend reaches out, but can’t grab him in time. They were just to far apart.


FireFanatic


'Cunt: the movie'

Member Lvl: 68
Egg Points: 1662896
Posts: 11797

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:34 p.m. - Subject:

One day there was a guy named Mack. All his friends called him "Big Mack" because of his size. Mack had always wanted to be a bus driver, and one day his dream came true. He finally became one. They gave him his bus, which was yellow. When he saw it, he asked the boss "Can I paint it a bit, make it look better?" and the boss said he could. So he painted Sesame Street Characters all over the bus and off he went on his first route. His first passenger was a young, pale boy of about 8. When he stopped, Mack said "Hi! My names Mack, but my friends call me Big Mack". The young boy said "Oh hello, I’m Paul, but all my friends call me ’Special Paul’ because they think I’m special". The boy got on the bus and Mack kept driving. At the next stop there were 2 really fat, obese ladies. When he stopped he said "Hi! My names Mack, but my friends call me Big Mack". The ladies introduced themselves as Patty and Patty (2 patty’s). They got on the bus and away they went. At the next stop was this punk guy. When Mack stopped he said "Hi! My names Mack, but my friends call me Big Mack". The Punk said "Yeah Hi, I’m Lester, But people call me Lester Sneeze because I sneeze a lot." He got on the bus and away they went. Everything was going fine until Lester pulled out his knife and started to pick the Bunyins off his foot and fling them at the Paul. Paul got really scared and ran under the seat where the 2 Obese Patty’s where. They didnt know what was happening and started to scream, and then Paul started crying and then Lester started picking his bunyins and flinging them at the 2 Patty’s and Paul. Mack got really confused and didnt know what to do, so he ran off the bus and to the phone booth. He put his money in and called his boss. When he picked up, Mack said "HEY! I GOT A PROBLEM!!! I HAVE TWO ALL BEEF PATTIES SPECIAL PAUL AND LESTER CHEESE PIKCING BUNYINS ON A SESAME STREET BUS!!!!!


FluffyLuffy-8285


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Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:42 p.m. - Subject:

Heres another one i just thought of.....This is for all the steelers fans out there!


Theres a Steelers fan, browns fan, Ravens fan, and a Patriots fan climbing a mountain....and there all arguing who’s most loyal to there team. The Browns fan says "THIS IS FOR THE BROWNS!" and jumps off the mountain.
Then not wanting ot be shown up by the browns fan the ravens fan screams"THIS IS FOR THE RAVENS!" and jumps off the mountain.

Finally the steelers fan screams "THIS IS FOR THE STEELERS!" and pushes the Patriots fan off the mountain.


Ok next joke.

A teacher tells her class thats shes a patriots fan, and asks who else is a patriots fan. All of the children, wanting to impress there teacher all raise their hands, except one little girl. The teacher looks at the girl and says," Jenny dear why aren’t you a patriots fan?"
The little girl replies simply, " because my mommy is a steelers fan, and my daddy is a steelers fan, so I’m a steelers fan."

The teacher, now obviously annoyed, says" well you know you don’t always have to be like your parents, like what if your daddy was an idiot and your mommy was a moron, the who would you be a fan of?"

And then the little girl smiles and says " Well then I would be Patriots fan....."


HAHAHA^^^



Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:42 p.m. - Subject:

Why do women have small feet?
So they can stand closer to the stove.


Why can’t women ski?
There is no snow between the kitchen and the bedroom.


What do you tell a women with two black eyes?
Nothing you already told her twice.


What is the ultimate Jewish dilemma?
Pork on sale.


Cthulhu


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Member Lvl: 21
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Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:46 p.m. - Subject:

How was cooper wire invented?
two mexicans fighting over a penny.

how long does it take a black woman to take a dump?
9 months.



Posted: Dec 30, 2007 4:52 p.m. - Subject:

Quote:
Two friends are down on their luck with the ladies and decide to give blind dating a try by hooking each other up. With the confidence to ask out a girl on someone else’s behalf, for there is no fear of personal rejection, they both find a date that would be good for the other. To make it more casual, they set up a time for all 4 people to meet, making a reservation at a local pub style diner.

The night wears on, and everyone is halving a good time. The women are gorgeous, and both friends feel that they have scored. So much so, in fact, that when both women leave to the bathroom neither guy is to worried.

"Prolly talking about how great we are," says one. The other nods, and holds up his hand for the traditional ’score’ high five. Two hands collide, knocking one off balance. As he falls to the floor, his friend reaches out, but can’t grab him in time. They were just to far apart.


That doesn’t make sense.


Kapraxis


Power Egg
Member Lvl: 20
Egg Points: 2340957
Posts: 972

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 5:00 p.m. - Subject:

Shut up and lauph at the stupid furfag like your supose to. Now with poor spelling.


the1337


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Member Lvl: 10
Egg Points: 9327
Posts: 1068
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Posted: Dec 30, 2007 5:09 p.m. - Subject:

This one is really bad but hey..

Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza?

the pizza doesnt scream when you throw it in an oven


Kapraxis


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Member Lvl: 20
Egg Points: 2340957
Posts: 972

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 5:11 p.m. - Subject:

The black jews had to stand in the back of the oven...


SinisterSkater


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Egg Points: 4403
Posts: 2190
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Posted: Dec 30, 2007 5:13 p.m. - Subject:

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you’re supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That’s very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. "Oh, den I uses the last names."

A truck driver is driving through a little town in Georgia wit a truck load of bowling balls. In this town there is 2 state troupers who hate truck drivers with a passion. The truck driver sees the two and turns off at the next exit. He sees a little black boy on a bike hitch hicking he picks up the little boy but tells him, "you cant ride up here but you can ride in the back. So he put’s the little black boy and his bike in the back and get’s back on the interstate. the two state cops see him again and pull him over they start giving him hell just looking for something to write him up for. They can’t find anything so they are about to let him go then one says to the other, "We forgot to check the back." So one goes to the back opens the doors, slams them back comes up to the truck driver. The cop is whiter than a ghost and scared as hell, and says "Get the hell out of my town, get the hell out of my county, get the hell out of my state and don’t ever come back." So the truck driver leaves. when they get back into the car one looks at the other and says "what the hell did you see back there?" the other says, "That guy was carring a truck load of black babys and one had already hatched and stolen a bike".


Lisk


'DU HAST MICH'

Member Lvl: 60
Egg Points: 2799580
Posts: 2657
AIM YIM

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 5:54 p.m. - Subject:

LMFAO sinister skater those were pretty good.

Those all were pretty good. ill tihnk of some.


zero-skater


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Member Lvl: 5
Egg Points: 825
Posts: 35

Posted: Dec 30, 2007 6:42 p.m. - Subject:

A truck driver is driving down a long highway when he sees an Aboriginal man walking down the side of the road with two pieces of corrugated iron and a case of beer, the truck driver pulls over and asks him what his doing. the Aboriginal man replies" me and me wife just got a divorce she got the kids and the money, i go the house and con tense.

The same truck diver drives down furthur down the highway and sees and old lady hitch hiking he picks up the lady and when she falls asleep he forgets she is in the cabin. The lady awakes and says that she just heard three huge thuds and the truck driver says yes i just hit an Aboriginal and the lady replies but i heard three thuds the man says yes well i had to go through two fences to get him.
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