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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 14467
Posts: 978
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:20 p.m. - Subject: |
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haha..
My crazy friend went up to some girl and said, "Hey!! Do you want to be my future ex-wife, and have my babies?"
She gave him a dirty look. I thought she was going to kick him in the nuts, luckily she was a yuppie.
"Gurl.. if you were a booger, I’d pick you first."
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 8
Egg Points: 26875
Posts: 1141
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:23 p.m. - Subject: |
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Haha, for Apirl fools me and my friend wlked up to some ugly girls and asked them out. After they said yes, we were all like "april fools, biatch"
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 18
Egg Points: 48344
Posts: 2257
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:23 p.m. - Subject: |
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"You remind me of my mom, but not quite as pretty."
Seriously, instead of wasting my time with marriage, why not simply find a woman I hate, and buy her a house?
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 29
Egg Points: 334146
Posts: 3055
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:24 p.m. - Subject: |
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That’s a nice dress. It’d look great on the floor next to my bed.
Want to play army? I’ll lie down and you can blow the hell out of me!
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 8
Egg Points: 26875
Posts: 1141
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:24 p.m. - Subject: |
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Wanna go home and play with my wii, maybe after that we can play some videogames
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 20
Egg Points: 415468
Posts: 5368
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:24 p.m. - Subject: |
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"Is your dad a mechanic?"
girl: No why?
"well then how’d you get such a finely tuned body?"
(that got me a slap, and then a year and one month [so far!] relationship with my current girlfriend =P)
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 14467
Posts: 978
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:25 p.m. - Subject: |
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My man used this one on me.
"I’d suck a fart out of your ass and hold it in like a bong rip."
That one made me laugh. I thought he made it up, until some other guy used it on my friend, haha.
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 8
Egg Points: 26875
Posts: 1141
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 7:32 p.m. - Subject: |
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Quote:
"I’d suck a fart out of your ass and hold it in like a bong rip."
0_o
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 7
Egg Points: 2170
Posts: 880
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 8:17 p.m. - Subject: |
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Are you wearing lumberjack pants? "no why?" because you just gave me wood.
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Master Egg
Member Lvl: 48
Egg Points: 1269280
Posts: 1845
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 8:46 p.m. - Subject: |
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"If you were a pirate would you wear your parrot on this shoulder(touches girl’s shoulder closest to you) or this one(puts arm around girl to touch other shoulder)?"
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 14467
Posts: 978
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 8:54 p.m. - Subject: |
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haha..
"Was your dad a meat burgler?"
"No, why?"
"Because it looks like someone stuffed two grade a hams down your pants"
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 9
Egg Points: 14467
Posts: 978
AIM
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| Posted: Apr 15, 2008 8:55 p.m. - Subject: |
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the back of your pants*
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Master Egg
Member Lvl: 43
Egg Points: 1822538
Posts: 7552
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 12:20 a.m. - Subject: |
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Have you ever kissed a bunny rabbit between the ears?
*Pulls out pockets.*
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 10
Egg Points: 25257
Posts: 2476
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 2:55 a.m. - Subject: |
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Best pickup line
Po: Hey
Girl:Hey
Po:I deleted weasel
Girl:OH MY GOD it’s po, take me!
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 24
Egg Points: 525829
Posts: 4107
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 3:11 a.m. - Subject: |
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fucking hell Po, I loled.
Some of these are good, others just aren’t funny.
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 24
Egg Points: 525829
Posts: 4107
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 3:13 a.m. - Subject: |
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Also:
"have you got a keg in your pants, cause I’d tap that!"
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 8
Egg Points: 9406
Posts: 1412
AIM YIM
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 3:21 a.m. - Subject: |
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YOU: have you ever tripped over a stick?
THEM: no...
YOU *Pause, look at floor, then look back up like you just had an idea*: Wanna root?
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Power Egg
Member Lvl: 10
Egg Points: 25257
Posts: 2476
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 3:31 a.m. - Subject: |
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Them:Hey
You: I’m 10th level prestige in COD4
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Normal Egg
Member Lvl: 8
Egg Points: 5452
Posts: 230
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| Posted: Apr 16, 2008 10:56 a.m. - Subject: |
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I have had two of the most stupid pic up lines used on me.
we were at a halloween party at a local pub, when me and my GF were complaining about how the bar was closing early that night
So his guy reaches over rubs my thigh and says
"I’m open all night"
Second time was at a pub a year later when i ran into the same guy and the song "save a horse ride a cowboy" came on.
All the ladies where screaming at the cowboys that started dancing and he looks at me and says
"what is it with you girls and cowboys? I guess that leaves me out, even though i am hung like a horse"
ya. i get the winners eh?
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