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“ Revenge on a Restaurant / Revenge in a Restaurant ”

Story by anonymous , written 14 years ago 2153 views36 votes
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Restaurant

Vomit. Right there at your table, as loudly as you can. Stick your finger down your throat if necessary, but make sure that by the time you have emptied your stomach, there is a great pool of puke on the floor and everyone in the entire place is looking at you. This will bring about many apologies from the staff of the place, and gross a few patrons out enough that some may make a point of never returning. Hell, if the food’s bad enough, you may even get applauded by the patrons!
Surreptitiously place various "ingredients" on salad bar/buffet items. Tabasco sauce in the thousand island dressing will do WONDERS for the place’s reputation.
If you REALLY are brave and have a lot of time to burn, get hired as a waiter for that place. When serving people, use a BAD attitude, and when people ask you why you are so rude, mumble something about the place’s "employee training program". Or, say that you can’t stand to work for such a sleazy operation, and that you will be quitting soon. Make up a few horror stories about what goes on in the kitchen. Sure you will get fired, but you will have succeeded in damaging the place’s rep. This is a HIGHLY ADVANCED revenge technique, only use it if you are a good actor and hold a real grudge.
Convince someone that they have eaten a piece of food that has been soiled by some bodily function. Have fake "evidence" (or real evidence if you really are cruel) to back up your claim such as pictures.
Give your name as Pupupu to a maitre-de. When he calls you to your table you will hear, "Pu-pu-pu Party of four...".
Same thing but give your name as Connie Lingus, #*@! Hertz, Harry Colon, etc.
Freeze glasses to trays in the cafeteria. This can be accomplished by smearing the bottom of the glass with honey and sticking it firmly to the tray. Next fill the glass with ice, water and salt to lower the temperature. After a few minutes the honey should be frozen to both the tray and the glass.
Glue glasses in a cafeteria to the bottom of a table.
Dribble glass. Need I say more?
Put pure crystallized caffeine in someone’s coffee pot. This will make espresso look like milk.
Get some of the tracer pills that turn urine blue (or some other interesting color) Crush and slip it into some food. The victim will be peeing blue for 2-3 days afterwards though the pills themselves are just dye and are completely harmless.
Bake brownies or cookies and substitute Ex-Lax for part of the chocolate. Use some chocolate to keep the taste right.
Rig the lid of salt shakers to fail when used, resulting in a veritable salt lick on the victim’s food.
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